from Brand New to Lauv

in high school and college, my favorite band was Brand New. i mean, they will forever be my favorite band, and my “degausser”-inspired tattoo on my arm proves that.

but that was a way different time in my life. i’m 26 now, with new trauma, new pain, new feelings, new struggles — a new heart and head. i’ve had Lauv’s i met you when i was 18 on vinyl for a long time now, and referenced his final track in my breakup piece. still waiting for an answer on this one btw.

Lauv’s show tonight at the wiltern in LA cemented his spot as my favorite artist of this era in my life. there isn’t a single song from imywiwe that doesn’t bring me to my knees or light my soul on fire. the story and experience of listening to imywiwe from start to finish is unique and timeless and true to what i can only imagine was the magical relationship the project is about, in the greatest city in the world — a city where i’ve had the privilege of falling in love twice. ~ how i’m feeling ~ is shaping up to be nothing short of perfect, just like its predecessor. in honor of Lauv, his contribution to my life and so many other lives, i wanted to choose some of my favorite lyrics from the songs he played tonight. (forgive me if the list is out of order!)

drugs and the internet

i wonder what it feels like to be more than i am

paris in the rain

i might not deserve it but there’s nothing better

paranoid

after all of these nights laying right by your side
how could my brain make me feel so far?

am i who i am, who am i?

reforget

you’re somewhere else, i’m drinking not to guess

sims

hit rewind on all the times i got lost in my head
but i guess i’ll never see you again

yeah i’d say nice to meet you ‘stead of saying nice to know you

enemies

after all that we’ve been through
how could you pretend i’m someone that you don’t know?

why is your shoulder so cold?
i know it’s hard to speak with all our history

yeah i know that we can’t be friends
but after all the things we been
oh why do we, we have to be enemies?

easy love

guess you can say i’m attached
last time we called it a wrap
i came begging and all that

fuck i’m lonely

sorry if i say some things i mean

i’m so tired

everybody around me is falling in love to our song

feelings

know we’ve been friends
and love only knows broken ends
that’s what you said
but girl let me change your mind

superhero

don’t wanna talk about it
i was so wrong about it
can’t do a thing about it now

chasing fire

we keep our bodies tied together
to ignore what’s on our minds

sad forever

i don’t wanna be medicated/i don’t know how else to say it
i don’t wanna go through that war

[unreleased] for now (long distance song)

if i had a candle i would wish you back to me

bracelet

i walk down memory lane late at night
i end up losing my way every time

all of these melatonin tears i cry

getting over you

all alone with the ceiling
all alone with this feeling
and i wonder if i’ll ever let go

sitting here i wonder
if we hadn’t been at all
who would i be?

breathe

i found new york
laying in your arms
melt into the bedroom floor
never knew i’d stay for so long

the other

i’m caught in between
what i wish and what i know
when they say that you just know

never not

what we had only comes
once in a lifetime
for the rest of mine
i’ll always compare
to the room
in my heart with the memories we made
nights on fifth in between b and a
there’s no way i could ever forget

i like me better

to be young and in love in new york city

look who you made me, made me